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Literature Text
One of my assignments in college today was an assignment to find bad websites. Knowing of the abundance of personal websites hosted through a common free host called piczo I thought 'I can do this easily'. Yes I did, but in doing this (the easy option) I found myself taken into a world of abuse, stupid animations and pathetic pointless messages. prepare people to enter 'The rubbish bin of the net'
Lets talk content. Ok, fine, so why do you surf the net? Why are you reading this today? Because, like most people you wanted to do something. Whether its shop, read journals, view art, play games, it all has purpose. Enter a 14 year old girl perhaps, who thinks the world revolves around them. She sits there, chewing gum perhaps... and says to herself, I know Ill create a website that tells the world, who i am.
So she busies herself around and after an hour, she has created in her eyes a masterpiece.
So what does the average day to day surfer find? Ah yes, pictures of you.
who cares. Big deal whoop-d-doo. Who are you again?
I hate to tell you this girl, but no one online gives a shit about seeing pictures of you with Allen's goldfish, or you at Phil's house... and who is Ben??? Oh right, its your guinea pig or something. Thanks for sharing your holiday to bognor regis with us too. Oh look, shes even linked us to her friends gallery. Yay, I always wanted to see a picture of Simon eating at McDonald's, oh and look, there's Wendy trimming a bush. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Ok fine, so Ive ruined content, let us talk animations.
Yuck. I mean why???? Ok first page on one site, non stop animations down to the bottom of the page where there's a small link saying sign my guestbook or die. Very friendly.
What is the point of these animations? Is there any need for a Marge Simpson dancing? Or how about a delightful animation of a pop up saying your the best. How can you be the best if you haven't even met one third of the population? All these animations are, are something that the creator thought 'I know, lets be fun'. well Ive got a message to them, using animations is not fun. Its highly dangerous, like in this one www.maggie-wonderful.piczo.com… and in this one www.piczo.com/maggie-wonderful…
I hope someone was executed for that monstrosity.
Moving on, what could be more pathetic than JavaScript pop up boxes.
'Click this link' Ok, and what happens, a stupid JavaScript message pops up, 500 times insulting me. Fine, its funny at first, then you think, oh my god, some kid has sat there writing this out! That's 500 lines of JavaScript minimum! What a nonce!
Wont spend long there, on to Videos.
No. Don't even thing about it. To firstly subject anyone to an auto loading video is wrong, but to then have it play without controls is like forcing me to eat cyanide. It take sup my bandwidth, would cripple dial up users and no one really wants to see a video of you on a swing eating a fab and a sherbet dib dab. Don't do it. Its stupid.
Music.
Oh dear. Music is a very subjective thing. Personal opinions vary and one persons fave band, is the next persons nightmare. Think of it like those people who love playing their music loud enough hat the whole of the M25 can hear it. Ok so you can continue driving, and its quite easy to ignore, however, these websites don't allow you to avoid it loading, or to stop it!!! I don't want to be subjected to lame midi tunes of the Simpson's, or something that sounds like bill and Ben. Even worse is the MP3 ones as they take longer to load!!!
Your hit counter. To claim, I have now had over 1000 hits my site is uber popular is wrong. Why? well how about the fact that they are not unique. I know this because I refreshed to see,
seems like your not popular at all. And for the person who says, oh i'm not popular, I've only got 10 hits, maybe its because no one seems to care about pictures of you and Natalie when you were 5!
Over exaggeration is another kill. To claim in big letters 'My car is the best ever' on your site is stupid. Upon further reading, you notice that the car is actually an F reg Nova, with a missing back hub cap. Or to claim, these are the best sites below is another stupid claim, as the sites below are worse than your site. poor navigation, over use of animations, java junk etc. are a useless waste of time.
I think, the worst thing here is that every day, sites like these mentioned appear and grow, and they slowly take over Google, and eventually, there will be no decent information left on the internet, or it will only appear on page 104 of Google.
So please people, think about it, before you create a personal website... will anyone except your egg shaped mates care? if no, don't do it.
The views above in the editorial are all personal, and if you fail to agree with them, then understand that they contain no intended offence. Links given were found using this Google search www.google.co.uk/search?q=+sit… Any reference to real individuals are sincerely coincidental, and sites linked were picked at random. <i>
Lets talk content. Ok, fine, so why do you surf the net? Why are you reading this today? Because, like most people you wanted to do something. Whether its shop, read journals, view art, play games, it all has purpose. Enter a 14 year old girl perhaps, who thinks the world revolves around them. She sits there, chewing gum perhaps... and says to herself, I know Ill create a website that tells the world, who i am.
So she busies herself around and after an hour, she has created in her eyes a masterpiece.
So what does the average day to day surfer find? Ah yes, pictures of you.
who cares. Big deal whoop-d-doo. Who are you again?
I hate to tell you this girl, but no one online gives a shit about seeing pictures of you with Allen's goldfish, or you at Phil's house... and who is Ben??? Oh right, its your guinea pig or something. Thanks for sharing your holiday to bognor regis with us too. Oh look, shes even linked us to her friends gallery. Yay, I always wanted to see a picture of Simon eating at McDonald's, oh and look, there's Wendy trimming a bush. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Ok fine, so Ive ruined content, let us talk animations.
Yuck. I mean why???? Ok first page on one site, non stop animations down to the bottom of the page where there's a small link saying sign my guestbook or die. Very friendly.
What is the point of these animations? Is there any need for a Marge Simpson dancing? Or how about a delightful animation of a pop up saying your the best. How can you be the best if you haven't even met one third of the population? All these animations are, are something that the creator thought 'I know, lets be fun'. well Ive got a message to them, using animations is not fun. Its highly dangerous, like in this one www.maggie-wonderful.piczo.com… and in this one www.piczo.com/maggie-wonderful…
I hope someone was executed for that monstrosity.
Moving on, what could be more pathetic than JavaScript pop up boxes.
'Click this link' Ok, and what happens, a stupid JavaScript message pops up, 500 times insulting me. Fine, its funny at first, then you think, oh my god, some kid has sat there writing this out! That's 500 lines of JavaScript minimum! What a nonce!
Wont spend long there, on to Videos.
No. Don't even thing about it. To firstly subject anyone to an auto loading video is wrong, but to then have it play without controls is like forcing me to eat cyanide. It take sup my bandwidth, would cripple dial up users and no one really wants to see a video of you on a swing eating a fab and a sherbet dib dab. Don't do it. Its stupid.
Music.
Oh dear. Music is a very subjective thing. Personal opinions vary and one persons fave band, is the next persons nightmare. Think of it like those people who love playing their music loud enough hat the whole of the M25 can hear it. Ok so you can continue driving, and its quite easy to ignore, however, these websites don't allow you to avoid it loading, or to stop it!!! I don't want to be subjected to lame midi tunes of the Simpson's, or something that sounds like bill and Ben. Even worse is the MP3 ones as they take longer to load!!!
Your hit counter. To claim, I have now had over 1000 hits my site is uber popular is wrong. Why? well how about the fact that they are not unique. I know this because I refreshed to see,
seems like your not popular at all. And for the person who says, oh i'm not popular, I've only got 10 hits, maybe its because no one seems to care about pictures of you and Natalie when you were 5!
Over exaggeration is another kill. To claim in big letters 'My car is the best ever' on your site is stupid. Upon further reading, you notice that the car is actually an F reg Nova, with a missing back hub cap. Or to claim, these are the best sites below is another stupid claim, as the sites below are worse than your site. poor navigation, over use of animations, java junk etc. are a useless waste of time.
I think, the worst thing here is that every day, sites like these mentioned appear and grow, and they slowly take over Google, and eventually, there will be no decent information left on the internet, or it will only appear on page 104 of Google.
So please people, think about it, before you create a personal website... will anyone except your egg shaped mates care? if no, don't do it.
The views above in the editorial are all personal, and if you fail to agree with them, then understand that they contain no intended offence. Links given were found using this Google search www.google.co.uk/search?q=+sit… Any reference to real individuals are sincerely coincidental, and sites linked were picked at random. <i>
Im fed up with people thinking that its a fun idea to have their own personal website about them. Bottem line is, no one cares, and its ruining the internet
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Comments5
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I hate when people create websites about themselves on piczo, then claim that 'im s0 hawt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' and add like a bajillion smilies.